The Theodore Finchs

I finished All the bright places by Jennifer Niven... Very beautiful book. Everything about it was almost perfect. But after reading it, i felt very strange. You see TheodoreFinch died_ suicide and there was this after feeling i couldn't shake off.

    I was reminded of Hannah Baker and the song by Logic & Alessia Cara. Its not news that suicide and depression have become a thing of concern. It didn't really start to bother me until i saw an advert on tv. And now I'm even more worried than before.
   
      Why do people commit suicide???
  Some say its because they're tired of how shitty life gets, they can't handle it, they are not strong enough. I do not agree with the last one. I've tried to cut my hands before(palms not wrists) and i didn't have the guts to; so it takes a lotta fucking strength to commit suicide. No it's not strength they are deficient in.
    Amanda said "at that point, you feel like nothing, like the world would be a better place without you in it and that you can have all the love and support but at that time, it just doesnt matter".

    You may not agree but at some point we all have at one time or the other thought bout it... Not to actually do it but just thought bout it...
      So what makes this people actually do it?? What's  the difference between us the thinkers and them the doers? Is there a problem with them?? Do they think differently?? Is their brain anatomy/physiology different??? Is it an illness?? Should there be drugs for it? I dont know and i may never know...

          This is what suicide.org told me:
People do not choose to commit suicide... At that time, they are not thinking clearly and they cant cos the brain is not exactly functioning properly... There's a chemical imbalance in brain, they are in extreme emotional pain and their minds keep saying "you have to end this"....
       They don't choose to die just like people who die from heart failures and cancers do not choose to.

     Jennifer Niven said "people who die from suicide don't get flowers"... Do we really need to be told that there shouldn't be any room here for stigma & judgements?
     
      I may have a person be close to me and still not know if they are thinking bout it... because as we may, we just never really know what goes up in other people's head( Some weeks before Chase Bennignton died, he took a picture and he was all smiles and all). This scares the shit outta me because  i'll want to tell them:
             You are not alone.
The world will not be a better place without you.
Nothing would be the same if you didnt exist.
You are important.
You are needed.
You matter.
Stay.
 Please stayy.

      And to all of us "normal people", Please be nice. You can never know who's close to the edge. Dont push them farther. Live and let live.

      For everyone contemplating suicide. I hope help reaches you in time and that you survive. If i didn't know better now i would have said "find an anchor, a reason live". But i know now that its not a choice so i ll say "You matter and even if i may be millions of miles away, im rooting for you and i will always be praying for you"...💖






By Alaska.